Anyone else have a significant other who just doesn't "get" the tea thing?

Mine is constantly questioning every spoonful of tea I bring into the house. Well, it sure seems that way.

He said to me the other day “when will it end?”

And I said “as long as there are new teas to try, it will never end, so get used to it!”

For the most part he just lets me be. But sometimes the little comments are maddening. I understand, it’s not for everyone. But like, it makes me happy, and we are not going broke over it, and I’m at a point where I only buy tiny quantities….so what’s the issue?!

Anyone else have to smuggle new teas into the house?

I’m lucky, I’m on maternity leave right now so I’m the one who catches the mailman everyday :)

67 Replies

My husband HATES tea. I refer to him on my blog as “tea hating husband”. He even dislikes iced teas of all flavors. If it tastes like tea, it totally grosses him out.

I’ve tried every tea on him – the only ones he likes are fruity herbals with lots of sugar and flavored matcha (or matchaccino’s from Red leaf tea) made as a latte and more sugar. Never hot though.

However, I’m lucky he supports my tea habit to a degree. My tea collection is crazy, but he is mostly okay with it as long as I don’t spend too much money. But in the end we even out as if he does complain, I point out his monthly case of expensive rootbeers he buys. I guess it is no different buying tea (or fancy root beers) than having a wine collection.

On the weird side, pu’er really interests him. He likes that I can stash cakes and they last a long time too. Something about the tea being made differently and aged really perks his foodie interest. I caught him watching youtube videos on how they press pu’er. He won’t drink it though.

Login or sign up to post a message.

No, honestly while mine doesn’t drink tea often, he doesn’t say anything about how much I buy. I don’t ask about his hobby (computer stuff) either.

Login or sign up to post a message.

carol who said

Oh, I am so with you about this! We’ve been married 42 years but I feel like a little kid sneaking tea into the house. He doesn’t have any hobbies and doesn’t even drink coffee.
I now have multiple places where I store my tea just so he doesn’t see too much at any one time. I emphasize my swapping since that doesn’t cost anything (well except postage and tea). Hey, we could be spending our money on other things, booze, drugs, etc.
Want to swap? pm me. AND are congratulations in order? :-D

Login or sign up to post a message.

boychik said

You are not alone. In fact it’s sounds exactly like my hubby. When I order tea I send it to my grandma house. When I attended NYC coffee and tea festival he offered to pack my tea the night before and bring it there. He said sell it or simply give it away. When I asked him the other day he was having a tea with me abt flavors his response was tea is a tea is a tea. I feel your pain;)

Login or sign up to post a message.

Courtney said

I totally do! Not all the time, but because I am a full-time student and J is currently where the majority of my tea fund comes from, we have a ‘rule’ that tea cannot exceed my cupboard space.

I think how I won here, for the most part, is that I did have a more expesnive addiction, which dropped off substantially to almost nil in the last year. So he perhaps sees it as a compromise haha.

However, I have been known to sneakily find other space for teas I know very well he won’t look at. :P

Login or sign up to post a message.

I’m just hoping he never decides to count them!
Though I counted like 100 the other day, not including small samples sent by folks, so that helps!

Everytime he mentions something about it being a ridiculous amount of tea for any human to own – (“any normal person who sees that collection would be blown away and think you’re nuts”) – I am torn between saying “OH YEAH!? Well if someone on Steepster saw it they wouldn’t think anything because there are people with like 400 teas so how about a nice tall glass of shut up?”

But I fear if i told him that it would just freak him out and make him worry that I will end up with 400 teas. haha.

I do like to say “well at least I’m not spending money on booze or crack” (because, like, that’s obviously the easy gauge we can always use to judge when a hobby is questionable or not?? i guess? heh)

Also that I AM trying to only bring new tea in once I’ve drank/swapped an older one.

One in, one out!

Swapping is the best way to try things before buying, I’ve got to get into that more!

Login or sign up to post a message.

mrmopar said

I have to hide all incoming shipments. My main excuse is “I bought them to age for the Grand-kids”. Still works sometimes or the other I stole from my friend Roughage is “I am glad you found it I had misplaced it for so long”, or something close. Keeps me out of trouble most of the time. Don’t show your better half how many I have or you may be in real trouble….

mrmopar said

P.S I am glad she is not on Steepster…

“I bought them to age for the grand-kids” !! I love this!
I wonder if i could pull that off… probably only works with pu-erhs though eh?

“I bought them for our baby! By the time she is interested in tea drinking in 15 years or so we should be good to go!”

probably wouldn’t work for me ;)

mrmopar said

How about, “I am glad you found those old things I was afraid I had misplaced them”.

That might work!

“Oh THANK YOU Honey! I’ve been looking for that tea for 3 months now! Better drink it before it loses its freshness….”

Then he’ll walk away feeling like he did a good thing? haha

mrmopar said

That is a great idea! Care if I use it one day?

no, go ahead and good luck to you! :)

teaenvy said

With the serious appreciation for pu-erh I am suprised, mrmopar, that you havent told your wife the tea is investment! For some teas its not much different that buying a bond or stamps.

Login or sign up to post a message.

Just your significant other? How about everyone in my life. (’ ._.)

Login or sign up to post a message.

Kaylee said

My poor SO just does not get it. It all tastes pretty much the same to him. But our senses of taste are just very different in general. I tend to prefer lighter flavors and fresh fruits and veggies, whereas he thinks that all flavor is derived from fat, salt, and spices. Guess who’s likely to live longer? He doesn’t bug me much about my tea collection, but I definitely get the side-eye when yet another package arrives.

My dad, on the other hand, is starting to transition from “wow that’s a weird hobby” to “something must be wrong with you”. Not cool. Basically he has concluded that because he can’t detect any flavors in tea, they must not really be there and all tea blends are an elaborate scam to separate suckers from their money. His loss, though – now I refuse to waste my best teas on someone who won’t appreciate them!

Login or sign up to post a message.

teaenvy said

My SO is pretty supportive though he is not a tea drinker. He does not make fun of me or challenge my purchases.
I feel very lucky because tea is just one of 100 intermittent hobbies.
He did once suggest that Im a hobby quitter but he hasnt known me for very long. Just 4 years. So I just smiled and said “oh no, Im not doing that thing NOW, and might not for several years, but I ALWAYS go back”.

For those of you tea stashers its always helpful to place value on your stash in terms the other can relate to. My ex did not get it either, until I pointed out that my stash would be a useful commodity to trade if the known world digressed into zombie survival mode! Worked like magic. Suddenly we were wealthy in trade commodities!

For some reason this discussion reminds me of Imellia Marcos and her shoe collection. Somehow tea seems less selfish even if the hobby is out of hand. You can share tea with others and it had nutritional value. Tea is USEFUL!

Login or sign up to post a message.

Login or sign up to leave a comment.