The Official Tea Justice League
I move that we create a Tea Justice League in which we can come together with one loud voice and tell the tea companies how we feel about the greatest villains Tea has ever known.
At this point in time, my aim is to inform the creators that my arch nemesis, Rosehips, has GOT to go. I have tried so many delicious herbal infusions that would be a favorite I would buy and keep in my pantry if not for that blasted villainous Rosehips.
I have mentioned my woe in quiet circles and others have agreed that Rosehips is a terror to many. Amid whispers of disfavor for his devious acts, another name rose to the surface. Hibiscus. That dastardly side-kick so often found alongside the evil Bringer of Tang himself. I cannot deny that Hibiscus is also a serious threat to delicious herbal teas everywhere.
My fellow tea-lovers, as good citizens of Steepster, I implore you: join us! Stand up to the evil Rosehips and his viscious companion, Hibiscus. Let us form the first Official Tea Justice League and bring our concerns before the creators themselves! Individually our voices are powerless to be heard, but united, we shall form a force so powerful that tea companies everywhere will stand up and take notice!
If you have other villains you wish to name, come forward, be brave! Do not be afraid to stand up, for together we are powerful and together we shall defend our rights and each other as one!
Who’s with me??
Having perused the responses thoroughly I can see we have spies here on the Steepster forums as some of you have expressed interest in siding with the Evil League of Teavil.
That said, we also have some Justice League members.
I’m prepared to begin forming a list. If you wish to be a part of the Tea Justice League, do please respond with your superhero name (not your secret identity!! It should be a SECRET!) and your powers if you like.
Tea Justice League:
1. Commander Foxtrot (Powers: Has the power to sense evil tea. Knows what the Fox says. Also has blue hair.)
2. TimeLady (Powers: Always brews the perfect cup of tea, right on time!)
3. Roswell Strange ( Powers: Common Sense. Can find the weirdest teas. Has secret alliances with every tea company.)
4. Infusion Girl (Powers: Smells amazing, causes water to turn into tea with just fruit and flowers!)
5. The Overlord (Powers: 1337 web design skillz, bringing Tea Lovers together the world over, has a really cool hair cut!)
6.
There are also some known members of the Evil League of Teavil present.
Evil League of Teavil
1. Rosehips (evil ruiner of teas everywhere)
2.Dexter (who may or may not have a lab)
3. Ambiguous TeaFairy (who may or may not be trusted)
4.TEAser (who may be evil or good or… evil… or… I… I…!)
5.
Evil League of Teavil Suspects
1. Hibiscus (People are trying to clear your name, Hibby. What you got on them? eh? Who’s in your pocket? Who’re you threatening to smear? We know the game.)
2. Bergamot (Tho I am not convinced)
3. Coconut (Keeping the wrong company, eh?)
4. Cinnamon (People see where you’ve been and think you’re nice, but when you’re there in force… shudders. I’m on to you.)
5. Rooibos (Yeah, I’m watching you, Roo.)
6. Lavender (Putting people to sleep… clicks tongue. You’re a bad flower, Lav. We all know the truth.)
7.
Evil Food Syndicate
1. Artificial flavors
2. Artificial dyes
3. Chemical additives
4. Pesticides
5. Unfair Tea Labor Laws
6. Unsafe Tea Labor Practicies
7.
(Respond if you want to be added to the list!)
But I like hibiscus…..
Well I guess we have our first candidate for the Evil League of Teavil then.
(This is all playful by the way.)
Bergamot is on the Tea Justice League!
Clearly, you’re trying to infiltrate our fledgling organization.
(Besides, what tea has Bergamot other than Earl Grey? Bergamot is hardly a scourge of the tea world.)
This is probably a classic example of “we don’t notice it, unless we REALLY dislike it”. Blergamont is sneaking in to other blends. H&S Paris is a prime example, and there are suddenly things like EG chai floating around. Stop it before it takes over is my motto. :))
Bergamot’s not a bad guy. He’s just misunderstood. The poor guy’s been with Earl Grey for like a hundred years. Can you really blame him for wanting to try something new?
i’m with dexter… down with the blerg! He’s evil and ruins every good tea out there. he needs to go back to where he belongs – strictly in EG’s.
Bergamot makes the clouds part and the angels sing. I’ve been addicted, er, I mean a fan of it since before most of you were born. Don’t mess with my bergamot (wo)man. ;)
I remain uncertain of the decree against Bergamot. I shall keep an eye on him, but at this point, I’m afraid he is simply misunderstood. That Dexter may have a personal grudge against him… At this point there is one supporter and one detractor. Perhaps more voices will weigh in on the decision.
I feel bergamot is kind of a Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde predicament. It’s good when it’s restrained but adding it with a heavy hand is not pleasant.
Down with the nasty blerg AND hibiscus! good lord can you imagine if they teamed up together?! and Lavender too. Ick!!
I have a personal vendetta against Evil Hibiscus and it’s cousin Atrocious Rosehips.
But Sir Bergamot is a best friend of mine. However, I have joined forces on special missions with Dexter in Teavil City before. Am I considered a potential trader? Can I be trusted? Do I still get to be in the Official Tea Justice League? What if I have some joint venture duty to attend with Dexter, can I switch team occasionally?
(I think my Superhero name should be Ambiguous TeaFairy…)
AAAHHHHH Ambiguous TeaFairy my partner in crime. Always happy to have you along for teaventures…. Keep ’em guess on which side your loyalty really lies….We will agree to disagree on hibby and blerg – but join forces to fight against bad tea everywhere. ;)
Lol, just couldn’t fully commit without an opt out option ;-) yep, it’s all about joining forces!!
I agree about Bergamot’s nefarious ways. Today he appeared in a lemon black I drank unknowingly. He wore a nearly-invisible cloak on the first steep so I let down my guard but he was lying in wait and slayed me on the second steep, aargh. I dumped my cup and crawled away…
What about lavender? Can lavender be added to the Top 10 Most Wanted Dead or Alive list?
I have no love for Lavender personally, but I must hear at least some kind of charge against the villain. Can you describe what heinous crimes it has committed?
lavender is a dastardly evil sneezedoer. He undermines all delicious teas and infects the drinker with an inability to stop sneezing…
Lavendar is also known, I have it on other reports, to put people to sleep. Who knows what he’s doing meanwhile? Definitely a suspect.
Putting people to sleep is his superpower! I love lavender and his gentle, soothing nature. Lavender prowls the nights, bringing aid to the sleepless and comfort to the distressed. If anything he should be an honorary member of the Tea Justice League.
Lavender belongs in scented sachets in the unmentionable drawer – NOT IN MY TEA – thank you that’s all. :))
I clicked on this thread thinking it was going to be about an organization that advocates against exploitation of tea workers. Silly me.
While that is a fantastic idea that warrants real merit, this is merely the ridiculous frolic of an over-active imagination owned by a tea-addicted Discordian. :)
My gods, this is wonderful.
I think I’m in the Evil League of Teavil (ELoT?) due to my sincere appreciation for both Hibiscus and Rosehips; truly, though – they’re just doing their best to usher us into a new world…a BETTER world of regal, sophisticated teas.
You know who else was trying to usher us into a new and better world? HITLER.
Yeah. So I guess you like Hitler Tea too don’t you?
Well maybe you’d enjoy this!
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-BJZeZ9YUmog/UbCw5tnD72I/AAAAAAAAAYY/RybvIFVQE6w/s1600/Hitler+Teapot.jpg
NO! You’re not allowed to insult the fantastic Disaster-ware made by the pioneer of the technique, the fabulous and eccentric Charles Krafft! Umm… More Disasterware info for those curious: http://steepster.com/roswellstrange/posts/228577 Lots of cool Spone teapots…
(I would just like it to be made know that BOTH Pyroxy and I are supporters of Hibiscus – Commander Fox I respectfully suggest that while I may have a personal grudge against blerg, you seem to be the single detractor against hibby)
I’ll take into consideration your concerns, Dexter. (Who I am presuming at this point, owns a lab somewhere.)
I will maintain good faith toward both Hibiscus and Bergamot until solid evidence either condemns or condones them.
But Hibiscus always seems to be there when Rosehip is present, so perhaps I’ve unfairly associated her by proxy.
I really appreciate your kind consideration. I am neutral towards rosehip, and haven’t really thought through the association. I too will ponder that connection.
At this point – and until you fully understand my intentions – I am neither admitting nor denying having any connection to a laboratory – whether that lab be MINE or one that I use during my day job as a possible blood splatter analyst. ;)
I do not like the addition of cinnamon or its evil partner in some chais, star anise. Yuck.
Cinnamon is a saucy one. She hurt my throat last week. She hit me hard when I wasn’t expecting it and had me rasping all evening. I agree she should be carefully watched. She’s done some good in the right company, but obviously doesn’t mind affecting some evil when the situation calls for it.
Whenever I get a hibiscus or rosehip laden bag of leaf I hand it to my wife. She loves that disgusting $%^&. This is probably a battle that can never be won. What would help greatly is if companies would clearly label the package and provide this info on their website. If you think a tea needs hibuscus, tell us, so we can know it up front – and can avoid it like the plague. I used to feel this way about rose but have recently found I like I like it when done well. Same with jasmine.
I love rosehip, hibiscus, and jasmine. I must be on the evil side. Muahahaha.
OR AM I?
Rosehip and hibiscus are lovely flavors paired with the right palate (no not an evil palate). Plus, they are both loaded with vitamin C. I really think that this is a Dumbledore v. Fudge scenario rather than a good v. Voldemort.
The true evil in tea is artificial flavor. Who knows what kind of chemicals are in your tea when that, or even “natural flavor,” is listed. This ingredient should be avoided by tea drinkers at all costs. It must be brought down. This, and not other wholesome ingredients (whether tasty or not), is the evil that is threatening to destroy the world of tea. We should work together to conquer this evil force!
I don’t mind jasmine, but it really belongs on its own (in green tea), without smelling/ tasting like it should be incense. ‘Natural flavour’ and other such vague terms must be stopped.
Artificial Flavor is a part of a whole different Evil league. It’s the Evil Food Syndicate. They put chemicals, unnatural additives and dyes all over the place, posing as helpful, friendly, enjoyable company. The sad truth is these wretched beings are all moles and plants left to undermine the wholesome value of otherwise healthy food so their corporate masters can turn a tidier profit. I agree they are shameful villains and we must be vigilant of the Syndicate’s encroaching upon our tea domain.
I am terribly sorry not to have counted you chadao on the pro hibiscus side (I’m now counting it as 3-2). Though at this point I am unclear as to where your loyalties lie. Confusing. Yay hibiscus – neutral to rosehip – ewwww to jasmine. Me thinks Commander you are going to have a tough time sorting good from evil amongst us…..
Dexter, think “four color” here. Just because YOU like Lex Luther doesn’t mean he isn’t the villain. It just means you’re obviously a people who isn’t in the know about his crime and villainy. To most of the world he’s just a businessman. But try to convince Superman he’s one of the good guys eh?
Rosehips is my arch nemesis. YMMV! :)
Licorice Root- no matter what I have it in, always comes out tasting strongly.
I am in strong agreement with this one – just tried Sweet Love and it is very guilty of this.
Licorice is an ancient evil the world has suffered long. Do you believe that back in the twilight years of this nation’s capitalist economy, that jerk sold himself off as CANDY to CHILDREN? What evil! What abhorrent evil! Uuggh! And now he’s old and wants to travel in higher circles, so he’s found his way into our teas no less! He is most certainly a member of the Evil League of Teavil.
Ugh yes yes yes and yes. He hangs out with fruity or desserty blends and claim he’s there to add sweetness. Licorice is not sweet! He’s a scum-sucking road w****, he ruins my life!
I think we will have to set up a task force to focus in on these evil doers! Do we all get super-hero names? :D
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