3
drank English Breakfast by Flavia
186 tasting notes

How can people drink this!?

Seriously. How can you consume this beverage and enjoy it unless you hate yourself.

Or unless you have the world’s worst taste buds.

I figured, oooh, English Breakfast! Nom! And on top of it, this one is from Kenya! I haven’t had a Kenyan tea before (I have one on deck from Auggy), but yeah! Cool, let’s stick the little packet in the slot and see what happens.

Well, first off, this brews up really murky brown. Almost mahogany in color. It’s not clear at all. And the smell coming off of it smells like really strong Liptons, maybe jazzed up a little bit. It’s a fairly nice smell, and I enjoy sniffing it for a few seconds before I take the plunge.

I nearly spat it out.

This is SO BITTER. What the hell?! It just lingers and lingers and lingers. It tastes burnt and dead and awful. It makes you want to cry. I’m glad nobody was in my general vicinity when I took my first sip, or else they might have been worried. Due to the face I was making, of course. I imagine that it twisted into some mask of horror. I literally stuck my tongue out, scrunched up my nose, shook my head a few times.

Then I promptly ran to our pantry and dumped this in the sink.

No.

Just no.

Cofftea

English breakfast from Kenya. Amazing.

Jillian

@Cofftea: Actually I think Kenyan teas are used in a lot of EB blends these days – it’s not like they can actually grow the tea themsleves in England/Ireland/whatever. :D

Cofftea

Yeah I know, it just sounds funny.

takgoti

Fail.

And also, I’m sorry, but every time I see Flavia in your reviews my brain shouts, “FLAvia FLAAAAAAV!”

Laura

Oh no! Ugh – Succumbing to vending machine coffee/tea is such a gamble! :( Hopefully you can bring tea from home to your new job?

sophistre

‘How can you consume this beverage and enjoy it unless you hate yourself.’

I lol’d.

Rijje

Did you brew it on the Flavia machine?
I suspect the tempreture, but I am not sure…

teaplz

Rijje, yep, this was brewed in the Flavia machine. There’s not much else to do with the packet other than that…

I think it might be the tea. I tested out hot water from the Flavia machine and it tops out around 185. So if the black tea was getting doused with water that temperature… it would be crazy-bitter. It tastes either really old or ridiculously oversteeped. I’m not even sure if there are tea leaves in the little packet… I’m going to cut it open and find out tomorrow!

theyhaveways

Awhh sounds like a bad experience. I love the EB from Zhi, it’s from Sri Lanka. I don’t know what blenders are thinking using a Kenya tea in a EB blend.

Rijje

The machine I tried didn’t adjust the temp. to the tea. This made me cut open a bag of japanese tea and steep it myself. It’s a lot better… I only drink the tea from the flavia, on the flavia machine, if they can take the heat. Have you tried the green jasmine?

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Cofftea

English breakfast from Kenya. Amazing.

Jillian

@Cofftea: Actually I think Kenyan teas are used in a lot of EB blends these days – it’s not like they can actually grow the tea themsleves in England/Ireland/whatever. :D

Cofftea

Yeah I know, it just sounds funny.

takgoti

Fail.

And also, I’m sorry, but every time I see Flavia in your reviews my brain shouts, “FLAvia FLAAAAAAV!”

Laura

Oh no! Ugh – Succumbing to vending machine coffee/tea is such a gamble! :( Hopefully you can bring tea from home to your new job?

sophistre

‘How can you consume this beverage and enjoy it unless you hate yourself.’

I lol’d.

Rijje

Did you brew it on the Flavia machine?
I suspect the tempreture, but I am not sure…

teaplz

Rijje, yep, this was brewed in the Flavia machine. There’s not much else to do with the packet other than that…

I think it might be the tea. I tested out hot water from the Flavia machine and it tops out around 185. So if the black tea was getting doused with water that temperature… it would be crazy-bitter. It tastes either really old or ridiculously oversteeped. I’m not even sure if there are tea leaves in the little packet… I’m going to cut it open and find out tomorrow!

theyhaveways

Awhh sounds like a bad experience. I love the EB from Zhi, it’s from Sri Lanka. I don’t know what blenders are thinking using a Kenya tea in a EB blend.

Rijje

The machine I tried didn’t adjust the temp. to the tea. This made me cut open a bag of japanese tea and steep it myself. It’s a lot better… I only drink the tea from the flavia, on the flavia machine, if they can take the heat. Have you tried the green jasmine?

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Bio

22-year-old NYC girl just starting out on her tea adventures! I used to hate tea. If you asked me a few years ago what I thought of tea, I’d tell you it tasted like hot, dirty dishwater. Not anymore! I acquired a taste for tea when I started drinking peppermint tea for my upset stomach problems. From there I graduated to teas like chamomile and Lipton. But Lipton wasn’t strong enough!

I’m getting the hang of this loose leaf thing. Black’s my default, but I’ve found that I really love teas that fall into every category. I’m a purist – I always drink my tea neat. I prefer unflavored tea over flavored tea, and really dislike anything flavored with artificial-tasting substances. I’ve grown up a bit in my tea drinking, and I find that novelty appeals to me less and less.

I also am the happy girlfriend of the boy that created the tea randomizer, which can be found here: http://www.jaydeee.net/pickatea.php

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New York City

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