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Kelmishka drank Dirty Wizard by Black Lotus Tea

409 tasting notes

Steepster TTB 2025

I’ve been watching old seasons of Top Chef, and in the one I’m currently watching, there’s a chef who is notorious for using a LOT of ingredients in his dishes and always doing THE MOST with what he presents. I feel like that’s what’s happening with this tea. We’ve got pu-erh, orange, cocoa, apple, blue cornflower, honeybush, lapsang souchong, rose, red peppercorn, cloves, safflower… not to mention various natural flavors (cinnamon, orange, hazelnut). I can imagine this blend happening if I took my nephews to a tea-blending bar (Do those exist? They should!) and let them loose to create their own blends.

I’m not familiar with the wizard who inspires this blend — which seems unfortunate (for me), as the Black Lotus website includes this quote from him: “Well, my social anxiety is getting the best of me. I’m taking a walk; goodbye.” Been there, friend. Been there.

So anyway, there’s a LOT happening. Arguably too much. My biggest impressions are cocoa and orange, with the spices (cinnamon, cloves) warming up the back of the sip. It’s not bad, to be fair, and it reminds me of a Christmas-inspired blend. But it’s all a little muddy (…dirty?!). I think I would prefer some editing to the blend.

On a related note, that one guy from Top Chef got sent home in the last episode I watched. So there’s that.

Flavors: Cinnamon, Cocoa, Orange, Spices

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2 comments

ashmanra
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That tea is perfect for one of this month’s Sipdown prompts! LOLOL

Kelmishka
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HAHA, it so is!

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ashmanra
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That tea is perfect for one of this month’s Sipdown prompts! LOLOL

Kelmishka
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HAHA, it so is!

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Bio

(she/her)

I was an anxious child who didn’t like change, so when my parents flew across the country for my grandfather’s wedding and left us kids with my aunt and uncle, I was a nervous wreck. Our first night at their house was tough. I couldn’t sleep, so I got up and padded into the kitchen, where my aunt was puttering around. She could tell I was distressed and offered to make me a cup of tea. It was just Celestial Seasonings’ peppermint tea, but it was exactly what I needed. The tea itself, the comfort it represented, the ritual of making it… I was enchanted. I’ve loved tea ever since.

I’m partial to strong, intense flavors and prefer loose-leaf to bagged, but I also appreciate the convenience of bags and sachets. I mostly drink my tea straight but once in a blue moon I’ll add a little plant-based milk, generally oat.

I live in Maryland, USA, with my partner, three dogs, and one cat. I’ve actually been a Steepster reader for years and years, but only started posting in late 2021. :)

When I’m not drinking tea (or sometimes WHILE I’m drinking tea!) I’m reading, rewatching comfort shows, going for a run, knitting, embroidering, hiking, or puttering in the garden. You can find me on Instagram at @kelmishka. (My account is private, but feel free to send a request!)

Favorite ingredients, flavors, etc.

Maple (all-time fave flavor!), vanilla, caramel, and all things dessert-y

Jasmine, lavender, violet, and most floral flavors

Most spices, although I go through phases and sometimes get bored of generic-feeling winter spice blends

Most fruity flavors

Matcha and other vegetal flavors

Not-so-favorite ingredients, flavors, etc.

Bergamot (…although it’s been growing on me lately!)

Hibiscus

Overly artificial flavors (banana, coconut, mango)

Overly herbacious blends, although this varies!

Stevia, monkfruit, and other sugar-alternative sweeteners — blech

Chocolate — it’s hard to get it right in tea, though I love real chocolate!

Animal products, including honey (long-time vegan checking in!)

My ratings

90-100: The best! Will almost definitely repurchase.

75-90: Really good, and potentially worthy of a restock.

60-75: Decent, if not terribly memorable.

50-60: In the “meh” range, but possibly for personal taste reasons.

35-50: I’m not a fan, and this is not very good tea.

20-35: Varying degrees of bad.

1-20: Actively bad. Like really bad. I can’t imagine anyone disagreeing.

Location

Maryland, USA

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