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Tea Press Sipdown (379)!

In a rough place right now…

Yesterday was my day off, so I decided that I’d make some tea and head down to the mall to surprise my boyfriend with a visit. I haven’t really done that in a long time, and I thought it would be a nice/sweet thing to do since this week has been… hard.

I even picked this tea specifically because of its Irish inspiration. I thought it would be a nice tea to share with him, seeing as he’s Irish and very proud of his heritage. I made it with milk and sugar, just like he takes it too..

I don’t think it’s worth going into all of the details, but it was a BAD afternoon. I mean, it’s been a stressful month. He’s very close to 50 days of straight work, with out any days off AT ALL, between two jobs. Gradually, the higher than number count has gotten, he’s become more distant, and less affectionate. This last week, he’s just bee flat out mean. To everyone – and its come off in a way where he almost seems proud of it. It’s just been grating, trying to be this positive force and supportive when I’m only met with sarcasm, and cruel remarks. Insults every time I wear anything Halloween related (my favourite holiday, his least), being flat out told that there was no way I was going to be able to pull off the cosplay I have planned for comic con, told that the colour I dyed my hair looked awful on me…

So anyway, on his lunch break I went shopping with him and he kept asking my opinion on the clothing he was looking at. “Does this print look good?” “What colour do you like?” “Which gloves would look good with my coat?” Every time I gave an opinion he’d tell me it was wrong, or that I had no taste in men’s fashion. Or just glare at me, as if I was an idiot for what I was thinking. It was finally just too much, and despite my best efforts I felt several tears roll down my cheek.

After that he just kept pressing me over and over to tell him what was wrong, and finally I just buckled and told him that while I’ve never had an issue with sarcastic banter or the occasional snide remark (I think some of the strongest relationships are built around that sort of playful/sarcastic teasing form of flirtation) that it stops being fun/playful when it goes on for over a week, without any sort of compassion/affectionate actions inbetween to balance it out. That I wasn’t mad at him, but that I felt broken, beaten down, and just… like he resented me.

After that I just stood at his desk for an hour and just silently cried, while he said nothing/wouldn’t make eye contact with me. A few times I asked if he wanted me to leave, and he just nodded his head no. So I stayed, and I felt foolish for the tears streaming down my face. Finally, when he got off work, we went and walked to his bus stop, and he broke up with me.

And now I just feel… lost.

All evening I tried to figure out exactly at what point things changed for him, if it was my fault or if it was just inevitable. If I’m being honest with myself, I’m not upset that the relationship is over. I think, deep down, I’ve felt that is has been for weeks. I think what I’ve been clinging to, and what I’m mourning the loss of, is losing any sort of relationship with him. I’ve never ever been able to successfully remain friends with someone after breaking up with them, but he was the first person that I deeply believed that would be possible with and who I wanted to try to maintain a friendship with.

Except that’s not what he wants. He’s made that clear. And that hurts. So much.

I’m ready to let go of the relationship, I think, but to let go of the best person I’ve met all year? It’s killing me inside, and now I just don’t know where to go from here…

One thing I guess I’m certain about is that I’m happy this was a sipdown. I don’t know that I could handle holding onto this tea. I just know it’s the tea I’m always going to associate with this breakup. And I doubt I could relive that every time I drink it.

Fjellrev

Oh no, Roswell, I am so sorry it ended like this and that he had been treating you so awfully for that long already. Work can be stressful but that is still never an excuse. Be good to yourself.

Nattie

I’m so sorry! I know it won’t feel like it now but truly it is for the best in the long run. You deserve someone who will treat you so much better than that. Sending my love.

Rosehips

Oh Roswell, I’m so sorry. Things will probably be rough for a while, which sucks. I second Fjellrev, be kind to yourself. One step at a time, and a lot, lot, lot of tea.

Evol Ving Ness

Oh, Ms. Strange. I am so sorry.

Evol Ving Ness

I am sending you big hugs through cyberspace. Be very kind to yourself.

One of these days, you are going to meet someone who sees your awesomeness.

Indigobloom

It sounds like this breakup was all about him. Definitely not about you! That boy has some growing up to do (we all do, I am sure, I’m just sad it came down on you in this awful way). Hugs if you want them xo

mrmopar

Ros, just take a step back and catch your breath. I know it is hard but sometimes things happen to lead you in another direction. Let nothing hold you down from what you can do.

LuckyMe

Oh man, so sorry to hear. Work related stress is tough but that’s no excuse to mistreat someone. I hope he comes to his senses and apologies. Keep your head up..

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Comments

Fjellrev

Oh no, Roswell, I am so sorry it ended like this and that he had been treating you so awfully for that long already. Work can be stressful but that is still never an excuse. Be good to yourself.

Nattie

I’m so sorry! I know it won’t feel like it now but truly it is for the best in the long run. You deserve someone who will treat you so much better than that. Sending my love.

Rosehips

Oh Roswell, I’m so sorry. Things will probably be rough for a while, which sucks. I second Fjellrev, be kind to yourself. One step at a time, and a lot, lot, lot of tea.

Evol Ving Ness

Oh, Ms. Strange. I am so sorry.

Evol Ving Ness

I am sending you big hugs through cyberspace. Be very kind to yourself.

One of these days, you are going to meet someone who sees your awesomeness.

Indigobloom

It sounds like this breakup was all about him. Definitely not about you! That boy has some growing up to do (we all do, I am sure, I’m just sad it came down on you in this awful way). Hugs if you want them xo

mrmopar

Ros, just take a step back and catch your breath. I know it is hard but sometimes things happen to lead you in another direction. Let nothing hold you down from what you can do.

LuckyMe

Oh man, so sorry to hear. Work related stress is tough but that’s no excuse to mistreat someone. I hope he comes to his senses and apologies. Keep your head up..

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Bio

Hello! My name is Kelly, though many people in the tea community call me Ros or Roswell.

I am a twenty five year old proudly queer tea addict, blogger, and all around tea geek. I grew up in the Prairies, but a few years ago I relocated to Quebec to pursue a career with DAVIDsTEA in the tea industry! I’m still working on getting my French language skills down…

My first introduction to tea, in any form outside of instant and bottled iced tea, was about seven years ago when I happened to stumble upon DAVIDsTEA while looking for a birthday present for a friend! I tried their Birthday Cake rooibos blend, and I’ve been hooked on tea ever since! In those seven years; I was introduced to the online tea community, expanded my interest in flavoured teas to include a deep love and appreciation for straight teas and traditional brewing methods, got a tea themed tattoo, started reviewing teas, amassed a sizable tea and teaware collection, became a TAC certified Tea Sommelier, & even came full circle by beginning a career in the tea industry with DAVIDsTEA!

I consider myself a Jack of all Teas, and strive to have a knowledge and appreciation of all tea types, formats, and styles of drinking. I don’t like to feel boxed in to just being a “flavoured tea” or “straight tea” drinker – my expectations may vary depending on the type of tea or how it’s been processed/prepared but if it’s good tea, it’s good tea no matter how it’s been made!

You name it, I probably drink it- and I’ll absolutely try anything at least once.

My default method of preperation is hot, Western style, and straight – but I’m not opposed to additions if I’m in the right mood. If I ever add something to a tea or use a different method of preparation I will ALWAYS call it out in the tasting note though.

I like to listen to music when drinking tea, especially when I’m brewing a large pot at a time or steeping Gongfu. Often I curate very intentional tea and music pairings, and sometimes I share them here in my tasting reviews. Music is something that I find can deeply affect the experience of having tea.

Favourite flavour notes/ingredients: Pear, lychee, cranberry, cream, melon, pineapple, malt, roasty, petrichor, sweet potato, heady florals like rose, hazelnut or walnut, sesame, honey (in moderation), and very woody shou.

Least favourite flavour notes/ingredients:
Lemongrass, ginger, strongly spiced profiles (and most Chai in general), mushrooms, seaweed, chamomile, stevia, saltiness or anything that reminds me too much of meat that isn’t supposed to taste like meat…

Currently exploring/obsessed with: Sheng from Yiwu, Yancha (Qilan in particular), anything with a strong sweet potato note. Also, I need to try ALL the root beer teas! Searching for a really good caramel flavoured blend, ideally with a black tea base.

Tea Pet Reference Guide:

Clay Pixiu Dragons: Zak & Wheezie
Clay Goldfish: Dot
Clay Monkey: Enzo
Jade Pixiu Dragon: Whitaker
Ruyao Carp: Splashy
Ruyao Banana Man: Pheobo
Ruyao Dragon: Pablo
Ruyao Frog: Bebe
Sculpted Pig: Nelly
Sculpted Tuxedo Cat: Pekoe
Sculpted Tabby Cat: Marmalade
Ceramic Rabbit: Rupert
Ceramic Stringray: Irwin
Ceramic Horse: Bergamot
Ceramic Snail: Snicket
Ceramic Cat: Saffron
Wood Fired Man: Leopold
Brass Mouse: Stilton

Please contact me at the instagram account listed below if you would like me to review your teas.

Currently I’m employed in the tea department of the DAVIDsTEA head office. While I’m still sharing my own personal thoughts on new & existing DAVIDsTEA blends, I am no longer numerically rating them due to the obvious conflict of interest. Any comments expressed are a reflection of my own thoughts and opinions, and do not reflect the thoughts and opinions of the company. Any DAVIDsTEA blends you currently see with a numeric score were reviewed prior to my being hired there and have not been adjusted since becoming a DAVIDsTEA employee.

Location

Montreal, QC, CA

Website

https://www.instagram.com/ros...

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